well the going to bed thing didn't really work..

i can't stop thinking..

at all..

it's like my mind is in overdrive and there's no way to turn it off...which is a shit cuz i dont like having a head full of racing thoughts..especially not when i feel tired and just want to sleep.
i'm a little bit grumpy bout it, too..
i tend to get niggly and antsy when i'm in these moods..it's like i want to sort everything out and know where i stand - but i can't. because even i know it's not that easy.

so i just called my mum..on my old phone..and it rang and rang and rang and eventually rang out. so i tried her phone..and she answered and yelled at me for not calling the other phone.
when i tried explaining that i did..she went on and on and kept on interrupting me and telling me i should have called the other phone..so i just yelled out fuck and hung up.
i adore my mother..but she does not ever listen.
and when i am tired..and just want to say what it is i have to say..i dont want to deal with her telling me "you did not call the other phone because it is here on my lap".
but i felt bad..and called back..and wouldnt you know i did call the other phone because she noticed 1 missed call.
i didn't mean to snap at her..but right now..i have no tolerance for anything that doesn't revolve around me and my issues.
yes..i'm a self-centered lil cow when i get into these pensive moods.



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