so i told myself i was going to do it..and i did it..
not just because i said i would..but because i genuinely wanted to...and i did...and it was exquisite...and now i'm finding that i want more...

which is a bit of a problem for someone like myself...
because..
i do not normally want more..
normally it's "been there..done that...i'm over it"

but not now..
not this time.
and it's distracting me to no end..

i thought it distracted me back when i just wanted it to happen..now that it has happened it's even worse (but in such a good way)..

part of me is a little concerned that i have gone and crossed a line that there is no way of uncrossing..and that it will complicate things in my life that i love...but the other part of me i hoping that i have unlocked door to something spectacular..
we get along so well..there is chemistry..and we are obviously compatible in more ways than one....so what could be wrong about it??
and why does that part of me that thinks it's a huge misteak seem to be screaming so loudly at the moment?

i need sleep..
yes indeedy...i need more than 3 hours...and hopefully tomorrow my mind will be clearer and everything will be right..



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