so i have my period...which would explain why i am as horny as a trucker whore on crack..mmmm...yes..and it would also explain my current shitful mood..
it's funny...because each month i get teary..and each month my back aches and my boobs swell..and each month i go through the "what is wrong with me..why am i feeling like this" thing...and each month i get my period...but each month i forget and have no idea why i feel so fucked up..
it's kinda retarded that way..
you would think that after dealing with my menstrual cycle for close to 14 years, i would know when to expect it...but no...not me...each and every month it sneaks up on me and invades my body...and i never realy have any clue until it's too late..
but yeah..
at least now i know why i'm feeling the way that i do..

so tonite..after dinner...i was feeeling particularly shitty and broke down crying and yelled at mum and robert...i decided it as time to get outta the house and into my car and go visit linnie..
something about being with her is therapeutic..maybe it's just cuz i know that she wouldn't ever judge me no matter what i came out with..or maybe it's just that we are so similar and she makes me laugh no matter how bad i am feeling..
maybe it's just a mixture of the two..
but yeah...i went around there and her, chris and i watched freaky friday and even though it was a corny "happy ever after" sap story..i enjoyed it...it was nice...and made me forget that i was feeeling like shit for a while..
well..maybe it's not so much that i feel like shit...but more that i just seem to be in a constant state of confusion at the moment..
like...my head wants one thing..but my heart wants another..and the two just can't communicate. kinda like sam and i, really..

but yeah..

things will work themselves out eventually, though...no matter how fucked up my head may be at the moment, i do have great faith in that everything happens for a reason..and it'll all work out in the end..

but for now..i'm gonna go sleep..



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