as always, things between the grrl and i are back to normal..

yesterday, after i wrote my last entry i sms'd her and asked her to come home..

when she did, i trierd being my ignorant bad-ass self...but then i looked at her...i looked into those eyes that i fell in love with...and i saw how much i was hurting her....so i rolled off the couch and on to the floor, crawdled across to her...apologized....cuddled her and just cried, and cried and cried...

why on earth do i give so much grief to the greatest person that ever came into my life???

sure, she shits me more than anyone else ever has....but she has also given me the greatest joy, and made me feel more loved and wanted than i ever thought any one person possibly could...
i know i'm the one with some issues...only i do too good a job of covering them up, so most people (myself included sometimes) dont even know they are there...
but she knows...
and she loves me even when i'm at my worst...

and i'm so fucking glad for that..


so yeah..
sometimes...all i need to do is think ahead into the future of a life without her, to know how much i want her right by my side..

*smiling*



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