i'm thinking an awful lot about death lately. not my death, but just death in general..and i don't know whether it's a normal phase, or whether i should be worried or what..
last nite i spent hours searching the internet for all the sites i could find - autopsy.com, cadaver.org, even celebirtymorgue.com...it miht seem really morbid and awful, but i've always been fascinated by death..and now since dad's death, it seems to be even more at the front of my mind.
before i got into nursing, i really wanted to head in the field of forensics, but then i deferred and that all changed *sigh*...but now, i think i'd like to work in that kind of environment, only thing is, there isn't much of a need for nurses in a morgue..
i was reading this in-depth autopsy page last nite, with all the details and stuff that goes on during a post mortem, and i couldn't stop myself from thinking "fuck, they actually did this to my father"..i mean, i have a copy of his pm, and i'v read it a few times, but it wasn't until last nite, reading through the details, that i really thought about someone doing that to him..i'm surprised that i didn't have nightmares from hell..i did go to bed last nite creeped out though, and i was expecting to have the most awful dreams - but strangely enough, my night was surprisingly blissful..
hope i get the same tonite..
0 comment so far..
jul 2 - fuckers
jun 13 - bored
may 11 - GAMSAT
april 20 - adios
apr 13 - babble