well, i'm back at the folks place, and true to form i can't seem to sleep. mind you, sam and i were both up at 5 this morning so that i could be on a 7am train outta clayton. let me just ask this
why one earth do people get up that early EVERY morning????? - are the insane???
it was a beautiful morning tho..all cold, dark and wet..there was so much lightening that on out way to clayton the entire city was lit up. it was awsome..even strangely romantic. not much has changed tho - it's now 1am and 20 hours later it's still cold, dark and wet - and the sky is still being lit up by the lightening.
i went to bed before, for a little nap, and was woken up by a stray SMS. i think if my phone hadn't have beeped then i would have quite easily still been sleeping. mmmm...sleep.
i had a funny feeling that once i got back here to the valley that my sleep routine was going to be shot to hell *sigh*. i had such the best few nights sleep while i was down in melbourne with sam, so hopefully they'll hold me over until thursday night until we're together again.wooohoooo because of the easter break we're gonna see each other on thursday instead of having to wait until saturday. which is great, because i don't think i could handle another week like last week.
but it has to be said -
5 nights apart is way too much
so yeah..this morning my train that was supposed to arrive at 8:50am didn't get into morwell until about 9:30. for some reason we sat outside of moe station waiting for some signal to let us pass..psst boy was i not a happy camper, coz i thought kater was waiting for me. it turned out ok, tho, coz she over slept and wasn't waiting for me, afterall. so while i was waiting for kater to get ready and dressed and come into morwell to get me, i called linda and asked her if i could crash at her house for a little while. i had visions of me curling up on her couch and catching up on some sleep, but she had other ideas and dragged me off to traralgon to do some stuff. i don't mind hanging out with linnie and doing stuff like that with her, but it's just so weird these days - especially since nikki says maybe only 5 words to me. she's obviously got some kind of issue, but i can't say i really care. i tried being nice, but at the end of it all i just think "fuck it - just be pleasant for linda's sake". but it's not just me. kater said that on the way to pick me up she pulled over and had a yak to linnie, and nikki wouldn't even look at them.
kate sid that she didn't even acknowledge their presence. i can understand nikki having a problem and being pissy with me, but what in the fuck has kater done?? but anyway - enough of that...can't say this is a topic that i want to waste too much time and effort on.
i would have liked to have seen chrissy tho, but he was at school.
so once kater and ant finally came around and rescued me, we went to katers new place and unpacked and cleaned up and stuff. unfortnately, about 1pm i just ran outta steam.
i just wanted to go homo and curl up in bed and sleep.
but it wasn't until about 5 that they dropped me off. it was good to spend the day with those 2 tho, it's something i dont get to do a lot of. normally i spend my time with either kater or ant, and rarely the 2 together - so today was good. i just wish i would have been a little more enthused.
it was weird tho, being around my old stomping ground - brought back alot of silly memories. you know the ones you don't remember until you see something that triggers it? well i had lots of visual triggers today...sometimes i wish i could erase my memories the same way i erase files from this infernal machine. not that they're bad memories, but some things i would rather not remember.
like tonite, i just spent the last 2 hours chatting to a chick who i haven't seen since i got lost on the campus grounds of the university of toledo. jenn (the chick) and i used to chat heaps back in 1996-1997, but after my US trip we kinda lost contact. and tonite, out of the blue *bam* there she was...and we began talking...and chatting...and reminiscing....and before i knew it i had a flood of old memories all coming to the front of my mind like you wouldn't believe. while some of them were quite nice and enjoyable, some of them i really would rather not remember. not because they were bad or evil or anything like that, just because..well..just because.
it was weird talking to jenn - we've both done so much since we hung out in toledo, but on the other hand we're both in the same kinda situations as we used to be. we're both still at uni..and both still spending too much time on line..but it was fun.
but i miss sam..
GOD do i miss her...
the last 2 days were some fantastically wonderful - it's hard to imagine that we ever get niggly with each other and fight *sigh*
..
things will be so much better when we move, and neither of us ever have to worry about being apart from the other for any longer than a night or 2 here and there. but at the moment it's just so stressful knowing that we're spending our weekdays apart and only having part of the weekend together. but i'm looking forward to this long easter weekend - i get to spend 5 whole nights snuggled up with her..5 whole nights! - i love it.
i am just so crazy in love with her.
i am.
i admit it.
she is the most adoring, wonderful woman in my life and i hope that there's not a day that goes by that i don't appreciate her and show her how much i love her.
she is my true north.
i sometimes think that i'm lucky to have met her and have her in my life...but lucky is $10 million falling from the sky into the backyard...so now i just think that what we have is fate
*getting goosebumps*.
jul 2 - fuckers
jun 13 - bored
may 11 - GAMSAT
april 20 - adios
apr 13 - babble